Where are we headed to?

I could not sleep much last night. Most of the time I was tossing and turning and my brain just refused to zone out. Twice I had to get up and go to the wash room thinking I was going to get sick.

And no. It was not because I was under any stress except the usual study-related problems. It was because right before going to bed, I had made the mistake of reading e-tribune’s story on Domestic Violence Bill reaching a deadlock in a joint sitting of the parliament. The current status is that JUI-F and even PML(N) are advocating against it and Maulana Fazl-ur-Rehman has vowed that he will fight tooth and nail against the bill that protects women and children from getting beaten up. Infact his exact words during the session were “Western culture cannot be promoted under the pretext of protection in Islamic states”, which indirectly means that beating up women is an eastern and Islamic culture and quite acceptable to us.

Let me tell you a very simple thing first. Why do we consider stealing or robbing someone a crime? On a human level, we consider it a moral and legal crime because we are violating another person’s rights and are harming him or her. We have been taught by our parents and then in schools that stealing is wrong. It is a criminal act and has adequate punishment. On a religious level, we are told that our Prophet (PBUH) condemned this act so much that he even said that he wouldn’t hesitate to cut-off his own daughter’s hand if she was found stealing. So, because we grew up with these things being taught to us, today most of us civilized people do not rob anyone, no matter how needy we are. Those who do eventually get punished one way or another.

I never had much hope from this Domestic Violence Bill, to put it in plain words. Reason being our society and its male-dominated environment would make sure such laws are never implemented in their true spirit. There are men who would favor this law but then they are in relative minority or atleast they are not in the parliament so it does not make much difference at this moment whether we have this law or not.

Having said that, there is one thing that I had been hopeful about. Even if such women protection laws do not get implemented in my or your life time, atleast our future generations will grow up being taught that it is wrong and a criminal act to beat up anyone, be it outside or inside of home.  This is how all moral sins and legal laws have been systematically ingrained in our brains. If a boy grows up thinking beating up his wife will be criminally punishable, he is less likely to do it when he gets married.

On a human level, we all know domestic violence is wrong. What strikes me the most is that the opposition to this bill comes from the religious right or let me say so-called religious right and they use Islam to justify the violence. And no matter how many times do I read the Quran or listen to scholars discussing the rights of women, I have never come across anything that allows men to harm their wives in any way. It is beyond me how people like Fazl-ur-Rehman, Khawaja Saad Rafique and even some women parliamentarians would claim such a thing and to my astonishment, there are people who actually think they are right and are protesting against this bill ! My only question to these mis-guided people is: Why is sunnah limited to having a beard only and not seeing the way Prophet (PBUH) treated his wives? This again brings me to the point that why do we even need to use Islam to justify such inhumane thinking when we know that in our religion nothing is against nature. How could someone even think that Allah (SWT) would ever allow his fairer creation be violently treated in something as sacred as marriage? It does not make sense to me.

I think I am too shocked right now and my belief in humanity is slowly fading away. Someone asked me a few days ago that why do women need separate laws and special treatment for themselves? My answer was very simple. Women NEED special treatment and their rights have to be defined and written because unlike men, their rights are not given to them on a plate. They always have to ASK to be treated as humans. They always have to ASK men not to beat or harass them. Otherwise it is considered NORMAL treatment.

I never call myself a feminist because I’m still struggling for women to get basic human rights; Equal rights are too far off an idea to spend my energy on. But this recent news has made me fear for the future of thousands of women and children. How can we bring up our daughters in a world like? If we shelf this bill now, not only women will no longer be protected; but also domestic violence will be seen as something legal and allowed which will encourage the abusive men even more.

And for those who are confused about Islam and domestic violence, try doing your own research for once , instead of listening to Mullahs who get votes in the name of Islam. It should be unnecessary to get defensive about such a logical issue but since it looks like some of the parliamentarians are bent on defaming Islam, I as a muslim feel appalled and consider it my duty to point out what Allah (SWT) and his beloved Prophet (PBUH) actually say about women rights.

1. Sabr is Not Suffering in Silence - Webinar (Yasmin Mogahed)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mzFJikLyG8

2. Removing the Silence on Domestic Violence by Shaykh Hamza Yusuf

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDEKJDgXO-U

Here is the link to the bill itself that i found on the national assembly website.
http://www.na.gov.pk/uploads/documents/1302132729_698.pdf 


Please try to find out for yourself where this bill is unIslamic and how could it promote westernized thinking as per JUI-F's tantrum in the parliament.

My apologies if I sounded like ranting. I needed to get it out of my system.

How to get famous in 5 minutes (Tips by a mean PTI TROLL)

The easiest way to get famous these days is to write an anti Imran Khan or an anti PTI blog. What I have noticed in my short twitter life is that most anti PTI tweets come from people who have lesser followers than the amount of eggs I keep in my fridge (No offence). Another remarkable fact about these people is that they tag a famous so-called liberal, blogger or a journalist in their tweets asking them questions ranging from “Where is Imran Khan these days?” to “IK has no vision, don’t you agree?”, to “@xyz: What are your comments on abc article about SMQ or Kasuri?”.

Seriously, people: I can give you better ways to get famous. For starters: You can go nude with an ISI tattoo. OR if you want to do serious work, make a documentary on some real issue and get an Oscar !!! Chances are, you will gain more “respectful” attention this way. And please stop tagging the liberals in each and every tweet. The reason is very simple: THEY ARE NOT LIBERALS ! Rather they are “liberal-extremists”. They don’t give a damn about you; All they care about is how negatively you tweet about Imran Khan or PTI. And see, because I studied science in school, I can even make an equation out of this situation:

“ANTI PTI TWEETS/COMMENTS  is directly proportional to  ATTENTION FROM PSEUDO LIBERALS”

Of course we can add all sorts of variables and parameters in this equation (for example your display picture or how ruthless you are in criticism, even gender) but for the time being, this will do.

=> ANTI PTI ∞ ATTENTION

=> ANTI PTI = DISPLAY PICTURE * ATTENTION

Right?

Coming back to the eggs in my fridge….

No…Let’s go to “how to get famous part”: I read a hilarious blog post by majorly profound (no idea what his real name is) giving a template of “how to write a thought provoking article” and it inspired me to make my own template on “How to get famous or how to write an ANTI PTI blog”. Since I have proved beyond any reasonable doubt that these two things are directly proportional to each other (see above), I consider myself qualified enough to make this template. So, let’s go step by step:

1. Identify a topic: You MUST select a topic on which you want to bash Imran Khan or target PTI. Even if you don’t find a good topic, it doesn’t really matter as long as you keep on bashing throughout your article. But let me give you a few choices to help you. 

• Problems in the Educational system
• Terrorism
• Corruption
• Energy crisis or any other crisis Pakistan is having

You can pick any one topic out of the above. It’s not important what you select as long as you relate it to PTI somehow.

2. Make the topic/problem sound like it is PTI’s doing or fault. It does not really matter, and I repeat, IT DOES NOT MATTER if PTI has never been in power. The liberals who will be reading your blog will most probably be watching Golden Globes simultaneously. Also, use following sentences to prove your point.

• Imran Khan does not have a vision. He rants and talks about ending _______(your topic problem) in 90 days but he does not explain it. (Please ignore the fact that IK does give a guideline about these issues otherwise you wont be able to write your blog)
• PTI’s policies are half baked theories and _____ (your selected topic) is not included in his manifesto. (Please ignore the nagging conscience which tells you that you have never opened PTI’s manifesto and the fact that PML-N simply copies everything they do. Also ignore that they are still in the process of developing their ideas into detailed road maps)

3. Now is the right time to attack the old faces entering the party. Pick any old face you last read about in someone’s tweet or blog. ATTACK !!!

• He is an old face. How will PTI bring change if it allows such people to become members.
• He was a Musharraf supporter. (Read SATAN)
• He is a rich person/feudal/industrialist. That fact alone makes him unsuitable for PTI.

Please ignore the fact that when PTI did not have electables, you were busying saying "PTI does not have any seasoned politicians". Now when PTI has electables (relatively clean ones, unfortunately God didn’t send angels for Imran Khan despite his frequent requests and prayers), now you have objections as to why PTI has old faces. You MUST ignore these thoughts because you have to finish your article.

4. Next step is to pick any other party or entity and show how PTI supports them. You can choose from the following:

• PTI didn’t criticize MQM in Karachi jalsa
• PTI prefers negotiating with Talibans
• PTI condemns drone attacks

Now here comes the real test of your writing skills. How you manage to manipulate the situation to your advantage depends directly on how weak your memory is.

If you select MQM, then you MUST NEVER mention that you were the one saying Imran Khan is not a politician. He needs to learn to be political. He is too direct and straightforward. Now Khan Sahab has learned some political tactics but you can USE it to your advantage and ask him why he avoided to clash with MQM in his jalsa.

If you select Taliban, DO NOT FORGET to mention his nick name “TALIBAN KHAN”. That is the jewel of this WHOLE article you see. Ignore the fact that the US has been brought down to its knees to negotiate and start the peace process. Ignore that WAR never solves anything.

If you select PTI’s anti drone stance, write a few words about how drones are killing high value targets. Ignore the number of civilian casualties and the fact that a true liberal NEVER SUPPORTS KILLINGS. NEVER.

5. If you still don’t feel like you have bashed enough, you can always refer to Imran Khan’s jewish connections. Lie through your teeth and go low. SO LOW that you reach the bottom of the earth.

Hope it helps. Try to use difficult english words as that would simply confuse a common person like me and your blog will look more "authentic". And GOOD LUCK with everything. Remember, if a pseudo liberal- extremist starts responding to your tweets, OMG: Mission achieved ! Get yourself a gold medal from a good sports shop. But don’t forget I’ll be there to troll you in the comments section or respond to your tweets which you can later retweet to show HOW FAMOUS you are.

Tsk Tsk,

A mean PTI troll.

and i mean it: A VERY MEAN PTI troll.

*The post is written in good humor. Dont take it literally please and kindly dont use this template for writing your blogs. Copyright issues you see. Ill simply sue you.

FAQs that I come across in the Netherlands

As a Pakistani woman studying abroad, i come across people who are so intrigued to know about Pakistan and its women. Its actually very nice to explain to people where we come from and to clear their misconceptions. Ofcourse, I tend to find humor in everything and sometimes i just throw in a regular laugh to put the other person at ease. Following are some of the questions that i find most interesting and are regularly asked by my friends and colleagues here in the Netherlands.

Question	My standard answer	If pressed for a more detailed answer
Are you an Indian?	No, Im from Pakistan.	Cant you see that we are different?
But how did your family allow you to live abroad alone if you are from a muslim country?	Well, women are allowed to study abroad or wherever they want to by our religion. If someone is not allowed, that is because of family traditions.	We can always throw a tantrum if we are not given permission ! Simple.
Why don’t you wear a head scarf? All muslim women do.	Well, my religion teaches me a lot of other things that I follow, which I think are more important than just covering your head.	Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t and I don’t know why, but that is just the way I am !
Are all women suppressed?	No. All women are not suppressed. If they are, that’s more because of our culture than religion.	Do I look like im suppressed?
How many Talibans do you know about?	None, atleast none in my daily life.	None. I wish they could come and see Pakistan and realize what a lively country we have.
Is there a war on streets in Pakistan?	No, not at all. Life is normal.	Except maybe inside a house. Haha !
Do all men have four wives?	No, most men have only one.	I think one wife is quite a handful – but if someone wants to go bald………
How come with your education and family background, you are having an arranged marriage?	Well, in our society, arranged marriages are safer and more reliable than love marriages.	Yes, arranged marriage – Arranged by “ME” – Haha !
Do you live independently or with your parents in Pakistan?	Currently with parents, future with husband.	If I tell my parents that I want to live separately, they will think im nuts or mad at them for something ! Have to ask future husband yet if he can tolerate me in the same house. :D
Why don’t you settle abroad?	Well, I have my scholarship bond and I want to go back to serve my country.	Your country is nice and I love it but I cant help myself when it comes to my heart that lies in Pakistan !

Home is where the heart is........

I love Pakistan. 

Its the country where i was born; 

where i grew up;

where i spent so many years with my family;

where i made friends with whom i shared my good and bad times;

where i fell ill from missing my dad when he went to karachi for a week;

where i was educated by the teachers i admired;

where i spent the evenings of 13th august glueing jhandian on a never ending thread;

where i stood on our house roof top to watch the F-16s on 7th september;

where i sat in front of the TV all night to watch election results;

where i cheered for our cricket team; 

where our "maulvi sahab" used to give a jumma khutba in his splendid voice;

where i bargained with khan baba over the price of a suit piece;

where i ate paratha rolls and masalay wali chhalli;

where eating halva puri on sundays was a must for me;

where i had my first and last PAAN and didnt know whether i was supposed to spit it out or swallow;

where i used to run to the door at the sound of walls icecream vendor;

where i watched my brothers flying kites on basant and ALWAYS failing miserably at beating the neighbours;

where i liked going to mehndi functions and hated barats;

where i tried over a hundred ECS chappals and bought just one;

where i spent eid chand raats looking for the right bangals and the best mehndi;

where the dhol wala group used to wake up everyone way before sehri time;

where i threw tantrums when my tailor got late in making my dress for eid day;

where my mom used to put food in my mouth when i refused to eat during exams because it wasted precious minutes;

where i cried for days when i gave a bad exam and kept picking out imaginary mistakes when i gave a perfect one;

where i taught students who probably didnt understand my lectures;

where i learned how to drive but could never drive;

I still remember a voice going deep into the winter nights..... "garam aanday";

Oh God; How i miss everything.

I miss Pakistan. I miss home.


Its where my heart lies.